Particularity Modern Warfare 2. I mean seriously, nobody ever let me join the army, or like.. hold a gun. Anything more powerful than a Nerf Gun and I’ll shoot my own foot off. Below I’ve outlined some reasons why I’m so bad at it.
The enemy is inside Burger King, me and a few squad mates are outside it. First, I throw a grenade into the window, it bounces off the railing and comes back towards me so I have to sprint around to the other side of the building. I see another window and jump through that.. at the exact same time one of my squad mates throws a grenade through the window I was at before. I had to turn around and jump right back out of the window that I’d just jumped through. Bare in mind that at this point the enemy hadn’t had to fire at me at all and I’d nearly died twice. The worst thing about grenade deaths is the info that comes up before you respawn: “This is the grenade danger icon, take action when you see it.” As if I didn’t know what it was.
There are two types of friendly fire that I have trouble with, one makes me mad and one makes me sad. The first one is when you crouching, looking down the scope, firing at the enemy.. and one of your genius squad members walks out in front of your line of fire. Umm, hello guy! I’m kinda shooting here! The second type of friendly fire is when there are two entrances to a building and you and your partner take different routes in. You go around, shoot up some bad guys, adrenalin is pumping through your veins, your wired to shoot anything that move, you turn around a corner.. and shoot your partner in the face. Even worse is when it isn’t one of the important characters and they actually die. I feel like the worst guy in the world.
“Roger, I have contact on 15 plus tangos and a BTR who are Oscar Mike.” What.the.hell. I’m not in the army, I don’t know what these words mean. I mean, I can usually figure it out but it’s just adding to my already considerable confusion. What’s worse is when they say “Ramirez! Bogey at ten o’clock!” When you’re in the middle of turning. So.. is it at 10 to where I am now? Or where I was? Maybe even some point in the middle. This is usually follow by me eating a couple bullets to the face.
Whenever someone is watching I play even worse than usual. I’m actually not that bad at snipering, but when someone’s watching I spray bullets all over the place, or, more accurately, just around who I’m trying to shoot without touching them. There’s nothing worse for your self esteem than someone seeing you waste a whole magazine trying, and failing to kill a single man running in the open. And not just a normal magazine, sniper magazine, where you line up each shot.
I’m a Lover, Not a Fighter
I actually feel bad when I kill people in Modern Warfare 2. Not all the time, not half the time, but often enough. I think it has to do with the level of detail in the game. When the enemy is wearing a mask and full army gear killing them doesn’t feel bad because they’re just generic mooks, who really cares? But when they’re brazillion gang members I feel terrible. I see them and think that they have lives, family. I think about how their whole life was leading to this point, and I just killed them. Soul crushing.
In conclusion, do.not.ever.let.me.near.a.gun.